Pollution and Cigarettes

Before I left I joked around about smoking in order to get my lungs ready for the Kathmandu air. It actually was a really good idea, because all the toxins in those cigarettes are nothing compared to the air here. Seriously. Most people wear masks, definitely if you are on a motorbike or cycle because you ride right into the exhaust fumes. To give you a good idea of what I mean, when I blow my nose, it’s usually black, not to be graphic, but you get the picture now. It’s such a nice break to go to the villages and breathe the fresh air. I think of all my environmentalist friends and can just picture their reaction to seeing the black, dusty air, and the garbage all along the streets (which is only really bad when the collectors go on strike). It’s just very surreal to be in the middle of these beautiful mountains and look around and see the air cause of the exhaust. So I might take up cigarettes in order for a breathe of fresh air. Plus there like 30 cents here, so it’d be a cheap habit. Though there is the message on every box that smoking is "ingeirous" to my health, so we'll see.

Foot tattoo's..not so cool

One of the first things that I saw upon arriving to Nepal was a swastika on a store sign. I was obviously taken aback by it, but then I realized that it is a symbol for I believe prosperity in Hinduism. Hitler took the sign and obviously distorted the meaning a great deal. Its still is an adjustment to see them all over religious temples and statues of gods and goddesses.
While on a mobile clinic I had the opportunity to visit a temple of the high goddess in Hinduism, it is one of the few temples in the valley that still does animal sacrifice. It was a really stunning place. There were no animal sacrifices on the day I was there, so I think that’s why it was a little easier for me. But the ritual of the temple is beautiful. When walking in you ring bells, in order to call upon the gods, then once inside the temple you can either pay for candles or incense, which you offer to the gods. You then take tika, which is red flowers that are crushed down into a powder, and place in on your forehead as a symbol of your devotion and blessing from the gods. You then proceed around the entire temple, touching the statues of each god, and ring bells. It is very cool to be a part of this experience. There are many little shrines to the gods around the city, in which you can place tika or take tika. To say the least Nepal is a spiritual place, which I am learning a lot from.
There are also many cultural things that I am learning here. For one thing there is a difference between village life and town life. Besides the obvious differences, in the villages arranged marriages are still common, and many of the brides are young. While at the clinic I often saw girls who were 17 or 18 with 2 or 3 year old children. It was hard to see girls younger then me married with children, and some of them looked so young. It was hard, not because of the arranged marriage, but because they have to grow up so fast. It doesn’t seem fair that I spent my childhood playing dolls, or running around with my sisters, and they have to assume responsibility for others. I don’t know if I feel arranged marriages are wrong or if I feel how young the marriages can be are wrong? Especially since the husbands are not as young. It’s hard because how do you dispute tradition? And why do I see it as a problem? Because I am American or because I am a woman and I feel I should have a choice about my body? But if I grew up in a place where it was common to have children young would I feel the same way? It definitely is a matter of culture, which makes it all more interesting. I know one thing; I give these women such credit for their strength. In the city, arranged marriages still happen but it is not as common. People here date, which use to be unheard of. However, if you reach thirty and you are still not married, that is when the family steps in and decides it is time to marry.
I have spoken before about the role of women and men here, but I definitely have more of an understanding now. While there are the fierce women, there are still the underlying male patriarch ideas; men tend to dominate in this society. One example of this is the basketball tournament I am going to play in (stop laughing, its to help Katie). It’s a women’s tournament, so Katie really wanted to get a women coach for the GA team, but when she asked one of are friends who coaches, she learned there are no female coaches, its just not heard of. The women are meant to do the work, and that is obvious. However, the men are not horrible people by any means. They are the ones who often take the children to school or get them on the buses, they also work hard, and my experience is that they love the women in their lives, its just how they were raised that women are expected to play a certain role. Again, it’s the whole idea of is this wrong or is it my ethnocentrism that makes it different? We can see this idea in America as well, it’s just not as common, because we have been raised to not stay in the kitchen, and to break through that glass ceiling. Though, one thing I do not agree with whatever the culture is the objectification of women, which I feel when I walk down the street to the Hey Baby, I know a big part of this is that I am a white women, but it still is hard to see the lack of respect, but again this is something found in America, I guess you just hope for difference.
Culture is definitely a funny thing, and one idea that I heard at Orientation is definitely sticking with me right now; Culture is thick. I know that the fact I have a tattoo on my foot, one of the most profane parts of the body, has thrown a few people already. And there is still so much that I need to learn about customs, such as handing things over with both hands, as a sign of respect, and it is not easy, but its good for me.

I'm American

I started my language classes,two days ago, and it is clear that I am American. Growing up in both Chicago and Wisconsin is eveident enough(or at least I have been told that by every American since Orientation)without trying to speak a new language so you can imagine what happens when I do. But at least I am aware of this, so I can work on it, whatever that means. Nepali is a cool language to listen to, but its weird to think that I will be speaking like that at some point. My teacher Pabratti is really nice, but she is tough, I will learn a lot from her that’s for sure. I have language one on one two hours a day, but I hope to increase that as the weeks go on. It’s pretty intense but that’s necessary to really learn the language. A funny thing is that I sometimes switch into Spanish, for example in Nepali ra is the word for and but I often will use the Spanish word y, which leads to Pabratti being like what are you saying? Figures it would take me learning a new language to finally get spanish. On a positive side, Spanish has come in handy for dealing with men here. I often hear “hey baby” or “tss tss” which is like a catcall, because they see me and think Oh American, white, wealthy, and unfortunately an easy target. So when they approach with Hey Baby, how are you? I often respond with No Habla Ingles. Which stuns them enough for me to move out of their way. I’m just waiting for the one who responds Hola! Then I’m in trouble. It is quite the perspective adjustment to be an American here. I stand out for not only my skin color, but also my height. Which is a weird change in fate, I’ve spent my life being the short one, and now I’m like Michael Jordon.

Mobile Clinics

A positive part of the GA is SAV which runs mobile clinics five days a week in the surrounding villages. I have been able to go out on two and have loved it. The villages are in the hillsides so the rides up are breathtaking. It is a really cool feeling to be above and surrounding by clouds. It also shows just how big the valley is! The mobile clinics are supported by multiple donor's, but all of the medicine comes from one donor who grew up in New York and has "the Irish work ethic, very down to earth" I am not making that up, that is really how he was described to me. He currently lives in Singapore and comes about 3-4 times a year to see how the clinics are doing. I am looking forward to meeting him. What the clinic does is it provides medicine to people who can't make it to the valley to seek help. They come to each village every fifteen days. It staffs five nurses, one doctor, and several students studying medicine. I haven't meet the doctor yet, but the nurses do a wonderful job. I mainly help with clerical stuff, filling in the log with the names and medicines given to each patient, and helping to fill out ID cards so people can come to the clinic. It is hard though, because I've noticed that many of the patients receive the same medicine each time, which brings up the issue are you treating the problem or the symptoms? At the same time, resources are scarce and many people can barley afford the 10 rupees for a visit, so how could they afford a hospital bill? At least by taking care of the symptoms you are easing their discomfort. Sean and I have talked about this quote a bit, and it seems like its just an endless circle. It also shows me how much I take for granted the medical options I have in the U.S., hell even here. The mobile clinics are something that I really enjoy, but it will be a lot better when I can speak Nepali, since for most of the villagers Nepali is their second language, so I do a lot of gestures. The one good thing is that with the kids it doesn't matter what you speak, you can still play.

Patience is a Virtue

This is especially true with my current job situation. When I accepted the position I was told I would be teaching HIV/AIDS education and then doing village outreach with those I taught. Then 4 months later I learned that it had changed and I would probably be teaching, nothing definite yet. Well that is still the case. I know that I will be working for The Learning Center (TLC), which is a part of the Godavri Alumni Association (GAA), most likely teaching ESL classes yo a variety of people. I will also help with publication of information pamphlets about TLC. I have already met my boss Ralph and I think I will like working with him. But, I have been told many times nothing is definite. What does that mean? Well, here goes. The JV's were in Kathmandu until about 4 years ago when they stopped working in the area and only had the volunteers in Godavri, which were usually 6-7 people. However, when Chris came 2 years ago he was suppose to be coming with 2 others but the others who were to join decided not to come, so he came out and joined the one other JV who was at Godavri. What happened to everyone? They all either left or were asked to leave because of various reasons such as health or complications with the principal at Godavri at the time. So when Chris came a big thing was to repair the relationship with the Jesuits, since the other JV's had left quite the reputation with both the Jesuits and the surrounding Village. We'll leave it at that. Chris has done a wonderful job as have D and Sarah, and the Provincial of the Jesuits at the time requested that JVI open a site for three JV's in Kathmandu, which is where Katie, Sean and I come in. Katie and Sean came and re-started the Kathmandu site, however, there has been a shift in power, so there is a new provincial, who happens to be the old principal of Godavri. He has a very poor image of the JV's which we have been trying to change, but since the old provincial only contracted three JV's, I could very well be the last one in Kathmandu, since the new provincial does not want more, or at least that is what I've been told. Another reason is the GAA where I work also went under power changes. Before Fr. Greg (one of the main Jesuits we work with here) came to the GA, it was used for drugs and prostitution mostly. When Fr. Greg came, among many threats and violence he changed the GA, and helped to elect a new president who created an environment in which programs such as TLC, and SAV (mobile clinics) can run. All good things must come to an end though right? So the president ended up leaving last October, and the new candidate was one who was a part of the old school GA, he clearly won, because why would things be easy? Therefore Fr. Greg is weighing his options about whether he will stay since these are the people who threatened him. Which is another reason I may not have new community mates in a year, because there might not be a job for them. Katie and Sean's positions have already changed from the person they replaced. They were asked to phase out her programs, and have had to pretty much create their own positions, which are still not definite, even after a year. See where the patience thing comes in. However, I will learn more about this situation this weekend during Orientation with Fr.Greg, but as it stands right now, its is a real possiblitly that JVI may not be needed in Kathmandu. While this is frustrating and led to me thinking why the hell am I here then? Its also provides the challenge to create a reason for me and possibly others to be here. But this could just be idealistic as well. So that is the whole Job situation right now...but looking at the positive side of things, I have loved seeing all the people on Motorbikes, and really want to learn to ride one, so if I don't have roommates next year, I can sell the cycles we have and convince JVI to buy a motorbike instead! No? Too soon? Anyways, I definitely am learning what it means to be adaptable.

Catch Up

Its been a little while since my last post, and obliviously things have happened, but for the convenience of reading I have separated them into different topics so you can pick and choose which you want to read!

Small world...

I am currently in Godavri, which is on the outskirts of Kathmandu, right in the mountains. It is beautiful! I have been staying out here with the other JV's for the past couple of days and it has been really nice. They all teach at St. Xavier which is a Level 1-10 Jesuit school. I went with them yesterday and was able to sit in on classes, which was alot of fun. School is very different here. First, age does not correlate with grade. It is very common to fail so for example you can be 15 and in level 7. Which is another issue, that I dont know enough about to get into. Also, all the girls in level 1-8 have to wear pigtails, its a femininity thing, which I was astounded to see. I never associated how I wear my hair with my gender, which can be seen in the short hair I have from 1st to 2nd grade. Its weird to see all these girls with pigtails, it just really throws ya. But gender roles in genral is an interesting thing in Nepal. You get a different answer from each person when asked. There are however some very strong Nepali women, and like most countries especially poorer ones, with out them they would not survive. Here it is the "job" of the woman of a house to collect feed for the animals, so they go out and cut grass and weeds with machete like kinves and then place them all in a huge basket. They then place the strap of their basket across their foreheads and carry it this way. This is only the physical strength. Most of the women here run their families because the husbands are working away or just don't care. They have such a prescence in the country but are not respected in that way, which is interesting and something I still have alot to learn about. Another thing I dont know if I'll get use to and I hope I don't, is corpal punishment. All, but the JV teachers use it which makes discipline for them hard, since the students know they won't hit them, but they have come up with creative ways, such as the Extra Homework Club, which is exactly what it sounds like. But the funniest thing about the school is the fact that the principle is a Marquette Alum, and that Fr. Wilde has been to St. Xavier. What a small world. I think I might be Fr. Matthew's (the prinicpal) new favorite because of this. He has already asked me to judge the competition students have this Friday. Overall the school is a wonderful place. Though, I know some of the JV's struggle because it is private and alot of the students here are from wealthier families, so there not helping the village children as much. I guess I don't see the issue as much becuase I know how hard my family worked for me to go to a private school and I am sure its the same for alot of these parents, and wealth in a Nepal village is very different then wealth elsewhere. These families are not living in the gated communities, thats for sure. The school also, has alot of scholarship students which come from within the village. And I guess I feel that even those who pay the fees deserve a good education too, and you shouldn't feel bad for providing it. But I also, am just getting a birds eye view so we'll see what I think in a year.
Yesterday, D (JV) and I went on a walk in the Botanical Gardens here. It was gorgeous, and I see why people fall in love with it. It's a far cry from the pollution of the city I see all the time. I really do enjoy my time here. Last night it was just Sarah, D and I in the house since Chris was in town, (which I learned means the city where I live) and we had fun talking and joking around about life when we get home. Its nice to hear them talking about being comfortable here since they have only been here six months so they still remember what it feels like to be me. We also, shared a bottle of Tuborg Denmark's finest bottled beer. Which is okay to drink unlike the rice beer which I learned is all bacteria...Oh Nepal, it never fails to amaze me.

Nepali Ho

So I am finally here in Kathmandu. It is a beautifully overwhelming place. The last leg of the trip was uneventful, minus the intense questioning over my visa, since I was applying for tourist visa to get into country even though I am a volunteer, which is technically illegal, so I did my best lying and fourtantely the guy gave up and let me go. Keep in mind this is what I was told to do by JVI so it would have been there issue.
My apartment is nice,its on the edge of the foreign district of Kathmandu, meaning its where most of the non-nepali live. However all of our neighbors are, so we feel better about it. I also live across the lane from the YCL which is also the Young Communist League, who are the ones causing the uprising and troubles right now. Its an interesting history with the YCL. They are only around because the Maoists after the revolution are recquired to live in seven Maoist camps, while the army is not allowed out of their barracks, its the peace agreement between them. So the Maoists did not want there leaders and main militia men to be stuck in these camps so the YCL was created and the men who were apart of that took on the identity of the top leaders and such so that the leaders could operate thought the YCL. Its definitley something that I need to learn more about, especially since they are my neighbors and all.
Some of the trouble that I am talking of is for example this morning we have no water and last night they turned off the power for about 3 hours. They ration power in the Winter since Nepal runs by hydropower, but its way too soon to be doing it now, so who knows the reason or who was meant to be punished, same with the water, its all about corruption and whos paying who off. O have yet to read a local paper since we only get them at the GA (where I work) so hopefully I'll get more insight once I start reading a daily, that and when I learn the language enough to talk to others, because thats how you really know whats going on.
My Roomates are also good. I am sharing a room with Katie which will be an adjustment after not sharing for so long, but we get along well and its been good so far. Sean is funny and definitley enjoys showing and telling me about Nepal which is good. I met the Godavri Community as well and they are awesome too. There house is the old summer Palace, but do not get that mixed up with a vision of a palace today, cause its not. It is on beautiful land and its a wonderful house, but I dont want people to think there living in splendor. I do however wish that I wasnt the only first year here now. Its a little rough especially when all the housemates speak Nepali and I have no idea whats going on. But they wouldnt have done it this way if they didnt think I could handel it, but it will feel more complete for me at least when Pat does get here in January.
Speaking of Nepali, it is definitley the main langauge here unlike what others have said. Since I do not live in the tourist area, people speak Nepali, and it definitley is a challenge since I do not start language classes until next week, but I am picking up the little I can now.
In Nepal another big thing is traffic. It is a total free for all, mixed in with a honking and yelling. But the thing is the honking is not meant as a get out of the way, rather a way to tell the person in front of you that you are behind them since you have the right of way. Thats right the person behind you has the right of way. Also the person merging onto a road does not have to look out for you, you have to merge around them as they pull out. Needless to say I'm glad I am not driving here. I learned this all when on the second night here I decided to go with Sean on a bike ride to the market. I think it was good that it was night and I really couldnt see just how many times we could have been hit. Though I was proud of myself especially after I heard that Katie didnt go on a bike until 6 months after being here, granted all I really did was follow Sean, who knows when I'll go by myself.
Another interesting thing is that if you are a driver and you hit someone you are required by law to pay for the funeral if they die or the medical bills if they are injured. It is cheaper to pay for a funeral then for medical expenses, so drivers if they hit someone will often try to back them over and kill them. I learned this because walking home from the micro (mini-van that is usually filled with 20+ people) and came across a Bundha which is when people or political groups will shut down sections of the streets by blocking them off in protest. Now the American in me was like what about the authorities? Dont they stop this? Depending on the power and number of people the group has. The bunts also lead to the shutting down of buisness and for me no work. I have already seen two since being here and both because someone has been killed. which is how I heard about the law. The reason why yesterday there was a bunt was because a girl and a guy on a motorbike were hit by a driver the girl died and the boy was badly injured. The guy who hit them claims he can not pay the expenses, which is why there was a protest. Its also how I learned (mom your may want to skip this part) that if I get hit to tuck and roll and jump up regardless what shape I am in, so that I do not get backed over. Good to know.
Otherwise, things are going well, I still am lost all the time but, I know it will get better. I just take it a day at a time. I am however looking foward to the cool weather in the next coming months....it is a lil hot for me right now!

So Tokyo..

I am currently sitting in Tokyo's airport, after 16 hours of flying, and I still have 6 hours to Bangkok and then a 11 hour lay-over, followed by a 2 hour flight to Kathmandu. This is alot of flying for someone who hates it, especially since I didn't find out until I was in the airport that I wasnt taking a direct flight to Bangkok like I thought. Oh well, they have free sake samples, which once stomach settles I will partake.

Oreintation went really well, I was suprised a little bit by that. I was definitly dreading the two week delay before leaving, but I it was good to have, plus I really got to know the other JV's plus a group of people going to Equador and Hati for a year. As cheesy as it sounds, its nice to have a network of people who understand what you are going through even if its all over the world. I am the only one flying to my country solo, which was initmidating, but I am half-through with only minor issues of baggage weight. I did get to meet Pat, my fellow Nepalease volunteer, who will be coming in Januaray, which was nice. He, fourtunatley made the trip with me to Dulles, where I flew from, so we were able to bond over spreading the weight out in my luggage. He will be speading the next four months or so Hiking the Pacific Coast Trail which goes from Canada to Mexico, so I know who I will be trekking with in Nepal! It was also nice to reconnect with others, and the Program Coordinators....it went by way too fast, and I already miss them.

However, I am ready to be in Nepal. Especially since alot of Orientation is pro-active, so we really don't know how things will play out until we get there. For the most part, it was useful, but obvioulsy there are the sessions where your like, what the hell? For me it was Theology and mission, which was the longest Bible reading ever, which is obvioulsy right up my alley. And the health one. The Nurse who came in, in order to get us to understand how fast disease spreads, because at 21+ years old we still dont know, had people spread Nutella on us, but with out saying anything which led to a one of the girls having an allergic reaction, and our clothes being stained. Then she went into an STD talk from hell, and to finish split up the men and women, and attempted to answer questions. It was sad, but funny. Otherwise most of what we talked about was good. I especially liked how the emphasis was placed on the fact the JVI is not a missionary group, that we are not there to change people, simply to walk with and empower those that we work with. Simply to be not do. However it was a bit discouraging that when we talked about roles of women and men, the role of women was to be submissive in many ways, and the role of men was to protect and set an example by their relationship with JVI women. I understand that I am going into a Patriarchal society and that I can not be as independent as I am in the states, that doesnt frustrate me as much as the tips for men, talked only about supporting women in being an example, but it didnt give any active encouragment for them or dangers of a man who stands up against the objectification of women. We talked alot about it in my country group Tanzpelati (since it was the combination of 2 JV's going to Tanzania, one going to Haiti, and Pat and me) it was very hard to reconcile the part of me that has for the past few years worked against the objectification of women and men's response to this, and the reality of what this will mean where I am going. In Nepal I can't touch a man with out it raising eyebrows, so what would it say about our relationship if a housemate defended me? I am fourtunate enough that most people recognize that were Americans and things are different, but that only goes so far. Its going to be interesting to see how this will actually play out in country.

So, there was alot of the deep thinking and intense conversations like this, but it was good, because I would rather have an idea about these issues then in country. Oh and one final thing about Orientation, we had a Talent show on the second to last night (which when I first read i was like really? but after two weeks of being couped up it was a good break) in which Tanzipelati did the entire dance from Little Miss Sunshine, I figured some of you especially me fellow BSO mates would be proud. But thats about it, I dont want to bore you all with the details, but I thought a little reacap of the Big-O might be nice.

It still is hitting me that this is it, that I am not on vacation, that I am not heading home anytime soon...although I do have a ticket to India in a month, in order for me to get a visa, so I always have that option I guess. Alright I have dragged on too long, and I think its time to try some of that sake!

oh, and please excuse the typos, everything is coming up in Japanese on my computer so I really dont know how its typing out, or if this will post.....